Parker’s Vegetarian Mock-Tuna Fish-Style Salad

In the Brooklyn Murder Mysteries, chef Parker Reed loves to experiment in the kitchen, coming up with vegan or vegetarian versions of classic favorites. In KILLER CONTENT, he comes up with a tofu-peanut salad inspired by a beach bar I once visited in St. Croix, and in NO MEMES OF ESCAPE he experiments with a vegetarian spin on migas and chili inspired by a delicious dish I had in New Orleans and a vegan mock chicken style salad. Today I was in the mood for a savory summer salad that for some reason has yet to be featured in any of the Brooklyn Murder Mysteries, but it’s one of Parker’s best dishes.

Please note I’m not a vegan, but I have been a vegetarian for over twenty years. Which means I don’t even remember what meat tastes like and I have no idea whether or not this recipe resembles tuna fish salad at all. All I know is it’s a refreshing summer dish that isn’t pretty, but it tastes delightful.

Every time I prepare this, it comes out slightly different. That’s mostly because I have different ingredients on hand each time. Feel free to experiment with your own favorite flavors and additions (like radishes or garlic)! Obviously if you don’t like one of the suggested ingredients, don’t add it to the mix!

This makes about 3 servings.

Ingredients:

• Chic peas, also known as Garbanzo beans, canned or dried
• Lemon juice or lime juice
• Soy sauce
• Celery
• Carrots
• Onion (green, yellow, red, or white)
• Tomatoes
• Pickles (dill, gherkins, pickle relish etc)
• Salt and pepper
• Mustard (yellow or brown)
• Mayonnaise (use vegan mayo if you want to make this dish vegan)

Instructions:

Hint: Double up on the tomatoes, celery, and carrots and cut back on the mayo and mustard for a more veggie salad taste, or reduce the diced veggies for a dish more similar to tuna fish salad.

1. Prepare the chic peas. If you’re using a can, boil them on the stove top until they are warm and soft. If using dried beans, prepare according to package. I like this method: 1/2 cup dried beans + 2 1/2 cups water in the InstaPot for 50 minutes on High heat + 10 minutes to cool.
2. Drain the chic peas. In a mixing bowl, smash the cooked chic peas using a fork or potato masher.
3. Add a healthy splash or two of lemon juice (lime juice also works but I prefer the results with lemon).
4. Add a healthy splash or two of soy sauce (approximately the equivalent of 3-4 take out packets of soy sauce).
5. Add a dash of salt and pepper (don’t add too much salt as the soy sauce is already salted).
6. Add mustard (yellow or brown) and mayo (vegan if desired).
7. Mix well.
8. Dice up fruits veggies of your choice. Add onions (2-3 small chopped green onions or a large pinch of chopped onions of your choosing), celery (~2 stalks), carrots (~1 large carrot), tomatoes (~2-3 Roma sized tomatoes), cucumbers (1 small), pickles (~5 gherkins).
9. Stir.
10. Package into a cover bowl and refrigerate for ~1 hour.

Serve cold on crackers, cucumber slices, or bread.

Hints: If it’s too dry, try adding more mayo. If it’s too bland, try adding more soy sauce or lemon juice. If it’s too savory, add more tomatoes. The combination of soy + lemon + chic peas is what makes the tuna fishy flavor.